Tall. Female.

“give me some of that height!”

“gosh youre so tall & beautiful! I wish I was tall”

“I wish I had your legs”


Just a few of the things I’ve grown up hearing from complete strangers. I don’t even want to get into the ones that have to do with sports, or modeling. 

The problems with being 6 foot 2 since you were 13 is that your body looked that of a woman, so therefore men treated you like one even though you had the face of a child. The problems with being tall and thin is that girls in school put you on this pedestal and deemed you the skinny girl. The problems with being tall and thin is everyone accepts you to stay that weight limit. The problems with being tall, is shoes aren’t made for you, women or men, very few companies carry a size 11 so you downsize to the mens 9..but they are too wide for your thin WOMAN feet. 

The problem with being a tall women is also if you’re a thin woman and than you aren’t. I’ve always been called an amazon, or big but I’ve always been thin so the “you’re as big as a dude” comments have been few and far between. But since having our beautiful son and suffering a miscarriage I’ve gained post pardum weight. and depressed because I lost my a baby weight. 

I don’t like to hold all my confidence and happiness in how I look, but there is a lot of negatives already to the way I look. I don’t fit in most clothing as it is, I already stick out and being thin made this awkward difference about myself more bearable… so what do I do now that I am not thin? The easy answer is “work out” “eat healthy” and yes I am trying but until I lose this weight again.. what do I do? How do I not hate myself? or lash out? 

Happy Christmas time!
This Christmas is special for two reasons, one being its our first Christmas as home owners, and the other obvious reason.. it’s Benjamin’s first Christmas as well!
Being a new mom is hard stuff. This week has been especially...

Happy Christmas time! 

This Christmas is special for two reasons, one being its our first Christmas as home owners, and the other obvious reason.. it’s Benjamin’s first Christmas as well! 

Being a new mom is hard stuff. This week has been especially hard because Benjamin has decided he wont sleep unless we are holding him or he is in his boppy. Which his boppy is not for sleeping so I have to watch him very carefully. We are hoping to get him a baby lounger next month but until then I have to carry him around everywhere. 

The hard part about this is, its effecting my diet which is effecting my mood. I don’t have enough time to cook at all! So I have been living off PB&J and candy. (we really need to get the candy out of the house.) 

I think the most annoying thing about being a new mom is the fact that everyone expects you to be positive about it all the time. Let me go off topic a bit, I am a sharer, I share a lot of my life on social media. Most of what I share is true to how I am feeling. That being said I posted a hilarious article about being a new mom and how the first two months actually fucking suck. That you’re so in love with this new human, and so happy but your fucking tired. You don’t eat, you barley sleep and there isn’t enough coffee in the world! Most of my younger newer mom friends loved it and thought it was so funny but then I got comments from seasoned vets, mothers who haven’t had a newborn in a decade telling me it will get better, and just wait. I wasn’t being negative, I was being honest! Being a new mom is Fucking HARD. I live off of dry shampoo, coffee and fast fixed food. I know once he gets to the age where he actually naps, and actually plays my life will be much easier. But can people just let me live my life and have a bad day and fuckin post about it?

I am not depressed, I do not regret this but some days I am sad, because I am tired and hungry. 

Anyways on a more positive note! Benjamin will be two months old next week, he can smile like a champ and when he’s in my bed he sleeps for 4 hours straight. He love tummy time, and loves me and Steven.  

My dad has cancer. 

Be kind to people, some people are battling things you’d never know. Not everyone shares every little detail of their lives. 

6 weeks of being you’re mother a lifetime more to go.
I wont say “I’ve never felt a love like this” because I have, your father is the center of my world. Boy oh boy do you open my heart more than I thought possible though. The human brain amazes me,...

6 weeks of being you’re mother a lifetime more to go. 

I wont say “I’ve never felt a love like this” because I have, your father is the center of my world. Boy oh boy do you open my heart more than I thought possible though. The human brain amazes me, to allow me to care for two people so much, I am so grateful for the men in my life. 

Thank you for being mine Benjamin William. 


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